We have nine showings this weekend, along with an open house on Sunday afternoon, so I should be sleeping on a giant pile of money by Wednesday.

In the meantime, I offer the following for your Friday afternoon amusement and/or disgust:

–  Sure, I acknowledge that it’s gross, but admit it: you like the fries, too.

–  EVERY ELEVEN DAYS. And I never go, which means some people are going even MORE frequently to drive up the average.

–  He’s spawned his own tiny douchebags, and now he wants YOUR children under his sway, too.

–  This inspires me to found my own magazine, Nut Punchers: A Guide to Nut Punching. (via The Spiteful Chef)

–  (1) “The Gambler’s Fallacy” is my favorite and (2) I have to physically restrain myself from using this on Facebook seventeen thousand times a day.

–  This should only be viewed by those with strong stomachs, and not within a half-hour of waking up in the morning. I learned the hard way.