It’s 4:08, and I’m wide awake. Perhaps it’s time to turn to the internet for some amusement, or for the provocation of thoughts, n’est-ce pas? Perhaps you too are awake, and have a similar need.
– Are you not currently sad? You will be now.
– I hear they also train them to be socialist lesbian witches. Just saying.
– This is ten thousand kinds of awesome with a glory hole on top.
– PETA: They just won’t stop giving me reasons not to like them.
– I would totally adopt a kid if I could be sure I got one like Nora.
– We really will believe anything we read, apparently.
– Number 12. Oh, yes.
– Your last drink would be a Coors? Really? Then you are not to be trusted.
– Impress your friends by knowing the proper terminology for a “sham deaf-mute.”
– Can’t any day just be a day any more? No, it can’t, so you may as well toss back some Goobers.
– Triple the serving size, deep fry it and serve with ranch dressing. There: book written.