Coworker of mine?
If you are, you are welcome.
This cake is for you.
I’d write a real post
but was up ’til all hours
baking this damn cake.
Why? Office party.
And the resident foodie
cannot disappoint.
So no description,
loving, of these beaten eggs.
You get some haiku.
Life, she is not fair.
So you should get a helmet.
Safety first, my friends.
This cake is not mine.
It is Epicurious,
but I can’t top it.
Dark chocolate, coffee,
it is redolent and rich.
Resistance = futile.
Yes, the equal sign
is cheating. But it is late;
the rules are hazy.
The liquid batter
bakes forever and ever.
Also: and then some.
Could have spent that time
writing a real post, but I
fear I indulge you.
Keep expectations low,
and you can fob a haiku
post, feeling no shame.
Perfectly flat tops
mean you don’t have to trim them.
A godsend for some.
I mean, we’re not all
facile with the trimming knife.
I’m only human.
For this same reason
I didn’t split the layers.
Also I’m lazy.
I spit on low light
that doesn’t let me get
needed shutter speed.
If I had good light,
you would see the whir! whir! whir!
and not just this blargh.
I fully support
you starting a collection
for my new Speedlite.
Like so many things,
frosting is better with booze.
Bailey’s Irish Cream.
I’m sorry you won’t
be there. Not my colleagues. They?
Will kill for cake. Again.
There are no pics of the
frosting process. Greasy hands
plus camera = full stop.
A bakery box
makes things more professional,
even for a schlub.
I’ll try to shoot the
innards, if vulture colleagues
can lay off long enough.
But no promises.
FIN DU POST.
Thursday Night Smackdown 
im impressed with you for not just eating all the magically baileys frosting and calling in sick to work.
says the woman eating nutella from the jar while reading foodblogs. you can see how high my standards are.
I applaud your use of “facile”. A vastly under-used word.
I have no co-workers, as that would require, um, working. So I don’t get any cakes like this.
Not that I ever got a cake like this when I WAS working. No foodies in my department–only dieters. Boo.
We have a few resident foodies at the office. Being one of them, I can identify deeply with this post. The frosting sounds so delicious, hope it was all appreciated.
I also have the damn luck for being known for a time-consuming, back-breaking, labor-intensive cookie! So yes, I know the feeling of having to show up at any occasion bearing the little rolled cinnamon bastards.
Perfection can be a cross to bear.
jesi, i believe that is one of the officially approved ways of eating nutella, and one in which i have often indulged.
allison, thank you.
kristin, not working is the tradeoff for not having cake.
laura, we’ll see how it goes over tonight! there are always such high expectations for my food, it makes me nervous.
cynic, thank you for feeling my pain.
Reasons why this is my favorite food blog:
Resistance = futile
Good grammar even in rhyme
Clever and great food!
I love the photo of the swirling frosting. Shutter speed change not necessary.
Being a resident foodie can mean much disappointment. I was the only one who signed up for the office cookie swap.
I work in an office full of so-called foodies, but most of the cakes brought in to the office are straight out of the Cake Mix Doctor’s cookbook. I may have to make this cake for our next potluck and put them all to shame!
Beautifully written post, btw.
I bow at your feet.
I bow at your feet.
Apparently I bow multiple times.
amazing. you are a god. the bailey’s icing is what did it for me. like amy, i also bow but only once because my back hurts.
I hope I don’t eat
this cake while delivering
it to your party
Actually you
should be the one hoping that
I don’t eat your cake
ah, this reminds me of the irish car bomb cake i made for a friend’s birthday. so craving chocolate cake and baileys frosting now. i’m jealous of the flat cakes, too! oh and since everyone else did it,
thursday night smackdown
makes chocolate perfection
also makes me smile
You wrote this whole post in haiku! Talk about making an effort!
Also, your comment on the equal sign being a cheat reminds me of my friend’s little sister having a haiku assignment and being a syllable short. She just added “Yeah.” at the end.
Yes, as a food blogger it is a burden to try to meet the high expectations of your coworkers neighbors and friends.
Well done! I hope they were suitably impressed.
Colleague of yours? Nay
no more; therein lies my woe
Your cake mocks me so