My potholders are funky. And not in a boogie-oogie-oogie way.

No, my potholders are nasty. They’re nasty-ass. They’re naaaaasty. They’re so nasty, they have to call Janet “Ms. Jackson.”

That’s why I need fun oven mitts.

I would take either of the mitts to the right or left. To the left, Marimekko, Finnish kings of colorful botanical prints. (Mitts from FinnStyle, obviously.)

To the right, Anthropologie. Everything they make is too cute for fucking words.  Also expensive, so an oven mitt is probably my best shot at getting some Anthropologie into the kitchen.

In case anyone is planning ahead for my birthday (helpful hint: I share it with Jesus) and wanted to get me some oven mitts, here, for your edification, is a mitt that I absolutely DO NOT WANT. I’m disappointed in you, Sur La Table.