I’m very sad to say, there were no jackasses who put falafel in a taco shell. I really, really wanted someone to do it.

Thank god for our stalwarts – I gotta get more aggressive about promoting this thing, or start farming it out to other blogs, or something.

Clearly, I failed to produce and used “coughing up blood” as my flimsy excuse. My plan had been to make a curried vegetable risotto with a mint and cilantro gremolata. Which I may still do this coming Tuesday, because dang if it don’t sound good.

Four of our perennial Tight Asses put forth their best efforts this month*:

*If you don’t see yourself here, recall that a few days ago I mentioned that the switch in hosts had temporarily caused my email to go kerflooey. All is working now, so re-forward your entry and I’ll get it up ASAP.

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Normally the tightest of all the asses, Dark Side of the Fridge decided to marry Swedish with Italian.

Frankly, it frightens me; they claim their Swedish potato sausage cannelloni is good, but then, we all know that Swedes are a bunch of filthy communist liars. However, the final plate does look like something I’d eat, having been inured to their communist ways by the IKEA cafeteria, and it created the opportunity to embed video of the Swedish Chef.

Total cost: $3.74 for 2, or $1.87 per person

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Kay at the Keyboard also goes with Italian – because we RULE the SCHOOL – and Japanese with her Udon carbonara and honey miso-roasted vegetables.

Kay “like[s] it a lot better than my original idea of stirring black beans and corn and peppers into the carbonara and making it Mexican.”

I must agree. Thank you, Kay, on behalf of all of us but especially my nonna, who felt a twinge in her fingers for having that idea in print at all, for not doing that. Also: The Olive Garden will be ripping that off shortly.

Total cost: $3.85, or $1.925  per serving.

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(non) adventures of an amateur chef (formerly Just Emily) chooses what? That’s right, ITALIAN, and pairs it with Indian and puns to come up with her ConFusion Curry Ravioli.

I admit to confusion as well: her ravioli – filled with lamb curry, and give a girl some bonus points for managing to come up with free lamb – isn’t traditional pasta dough, it’s a rice based, gnocchi-esque dough that takes a cue from Mario Batali. So maybe this is really Italian + Asian, or Nice Person + Mario Batali. Hard to say.

Total cost: $3.75, or $1.25 per serving (recipe feeds three).

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A Form of Function went with Thai and I’ll let you guess what else for these ravioli with Thai red curry, tomato and coconut milk sauce. That’s right. Whose country’s cuisine is the boss of you?

As she wisely points out, albeit too late for us, “Why bastardize one culture when you can shame as many as possible at once?” Which is why next time, we’ll be fusing a MINIMUM of five different cuisines into a single dish.

Total cost: 3.92 for 5 servings, or $0.784 each.

DING DING DING! We have October’s Tightest Ass right here!

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Muchas gracias for everyone who took the time to cook and post this month, and special congrats to A Form of Fuction. Enjoy your month of being smug, and let us know what November’s challenge is in the comments!

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