Ninety-nine-point-nine percent of you is porn. So what’s so offensive about root vegetables with freakishly humanoid genitalia? That fucking carrot caused my readership to plummet like a sackful of kittens tied to a cinder block. SUCK IT UP, INTERNET.
My challenge to the rest of you: send the carrot far and wide! Let all behold the wonders of mother nature!
I believe you, but, OMG, that is just unbelievable.
How i would love to see a well done survey of why that happened.
If this isn’t just holiday related coincidence, there are a lot of people out there who just need to GET OVER THEMSELVES ALREADY.
WTF? If I didn’t already subscribe to your site, I would have done so with much glee *after* seeing the naughty veg pic. Geez. Some people.
That makes just about no sense. If they were reading before and didn’t mind the profanity, I can’t imagine root vegetables scaring them away.
You really must get to the bottom of this.
(I had to DVR Top Chef the other night so was late on the your live blogging…but can I just say that you forgot to mention Jamie standing in front of the judges whispering ‘I really want this one.’ Who does that?!?)
WTH? I loved your blog even more after your sexy CSA carrot! :)Their loss and its too bad. Just more for us to enjoy 🙂
Your tagline is I cook. I cuss. And you do both. So I’m thinking your brand of readers wouldn’t be offended. In fact, if you had written the word porn in your post a few times, you’re readership would have probably jumped.
I did a post once on a series of green porno movies (really the sex habits of insects) that Isabella Rosselini recently put out. Every weekend the hits on that piece jump like crazy. Sad, but true.
You know, come to think of it, my readership is down this week. Maybe everyone is just online shopping instead of reading our intelligent ramblings. Don’t get discouraged.
OR maybe after last week’s First Thursday, my readers came here and saw your offensive carrot and stopped reading my blog, too.
Oh, conspiracy theories could abound surrounding your carrot of ill repute.
Okay, I’ll shut up now.
gabrielle and joelen, that’s what i would have thought, too!
robin, i’m not just talking low hit numbers – i’m talking a mass amount of people unsubscribing, all at once, all on the same day. eerie.
well, I didn’t unsubscribe and I’m what the majority of people would call a goody goody. Sometimes a carrot is just carrot.
Why would anyone unsuscribe over a freak of nature carrot. Lighten up folks!
Hey Michelle, are you talking about your Feedburner stats? If so, when did the dive occur? While there’s always some day to day fluctuation my Feedburner stats dropped almost 20% on December 5th. I’m wondering if they changed something? It wasn’t a 1 day glitch either. I’ve been posting and promoting like crazy this week and it took till Thursday for the stats to recover.
Tbh, the world would be a better place if there were more genitalia-shaped veg around. Bring it on, I say.
For the record, I love the porno carrot. It’s like modern art that can be eaten eventually if one so wishes.
maybe you should’ve put a pair of pants, an apron or skirt on the offending carrot. the victorians used to do that to their furniture (the ones with legs) lest the offending bits be seen.
I still read your blog. I am particularly fond of how frequently you use the “f” word (one of my favorite seasoning words). Other people are baggadouches.
My stats plummets too everytime i make a poopie joke. But i don’t care. I like poopie jokes. 🙂
Try putting a mini speedo swimsuit on your carrot next time. 🙂
I too think it’s the holiday season as I’ve also seen my readership drop…and I have no porny carrots. 🙂
For what it’s worth I have giggled about that damn carrot at least three times… and I showed it to my teenage son.