The Archives
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11.10.08Cheap Ass Monday: Roughage! Get your roughage here!I know, the post title isn't very exciting or funny or clever. Don't blame me, blame the three and a half hour meeting I had this afternoon. Don't we go to work at non-profits so we don't have to sit through three and a half hour meetings? You pay me less, I wear comfy shoes to work and don't deal with meetings; that is the deal, no? Also this particular meeting was three and a half hours, did I mention that? It is, therefore, not surprising that when I got home I wanted something quick, warm ...
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11.04.08Cheap Ass Monday: Brown Paper Packages Tied Up With StringIf you're here looking for a sub-$5 meal idea, I have to be up front with you and say that I actually have no idea how much this dinner costs. Maybe you can do it for $5, maybe it costs $100, I don't know. I just know that for me, it was cheap as free because it was made entirely of random food items that were sitting around and for which I had no plans. Food items that, I might add, comprise some of my all-time favorite edibles: farro, winter squash, onions, cheese and hazelnuts. A warm, comforting, filling ...
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09.15.08Cheap Ass Monday: Going All Derrida On Your BehindIt warmed my heart to see all you Aqua Teen fans. It's too bad the Wolfen is going to come for you with his razor. This odd transitional season - one-half Indian summer, one-quarter early autumn, one-quarter what the fuck is going on make up your damn mind - calls for an odd transitional dish. Chicken parm was sounding tasty but a bit too heavy, and I didn't want to have to turn the oven on. Instead, I bring you deconstructed chicken parm: pan-seared chicken breasts, tomatoes with lime and cumin seed, and pan-fried smoked mozzarella. Or as I ...
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08.22.08Thursday Night Smackdown: Blintzkrieg!How is this dinner, and not dessert? Not that I'm complaining, but come now, Jews. You're pulling my leg, right? Where did I leave off? Oh, right, with an aborted attempt at blintz casserole and my gradual descent into the gaping maw of madness. I'm back to my standard non-psychotic level of insanity, and that can only mean one thing: I can stop throwing dozens of hours of my life away watching Olympic beach volleyball in a drug-induced stupor.* Also, baked cheese. *Although I did like how they played the cock rock in between serves, to make ...
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06.18.08The Big Stomach Wave Makes the LoveWhat does it all mean? Hell if I know. All of today's captions are brought to you by the nutjobs who found TNS via google. This one's for you, Mr. or Ms. "Upside Down Belly Button." Really, what was this person looking for? "The big stomach wave makes the love"? Is it some grody thing that I'm naive for not knowing? If so, I'd like to continue on in my blissful ignorance. A few weeks ago the New York Times Wednesday food section had a feature article on ricotta that included instructions for making it yourself, and I've ...
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06.07.08In which people get the animal fats they want and deserve.All cow fat, all the time. Let everyone's collective panties be unbunched: tofu doesn't live here any more. I'm not giving up on integrating more vegetarian or vegan meals into my repertoire, but I am giving up on frankenfoods like tofu. It's still not in the same category as truly unearthly "foods" like quorn, but my kitchen doesn't need it. Healthy vegetarian foods are easily assembled using whole, fresh ingredients. That's not what this is about, though. Well, at least the "healthy" part: this is real deal mac and cheese, the kind made with a classic butter-and-flour roux, milk that ...
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04.29.08Strawberry Shortcake After DarkHey you...you like-a the berries? Come closer, I give you a berry. I was not in Whole Foods today to buy strawberries, I was there to buy a pork product for this Thursday. No, I will not specify beyond that; I've already said too much and will now have to reach through the internet and kill you. But as I was walking through the produce section, the berries launched a full-on nasal assault with their sweet fragrance to which I succumbed instantly. Because strawberries are the shit. I knew immediately that I wanted to make a quick but grown-up strawberry shortcake: black-pepper ...
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03.24.08When life gives you lemons, make orzo with goat cheese and spring veggies.What do you mean, that's not how the saying goes? Fuck you. You know how sometimes you come home after a long, tiring day sitting in front of a computer and stapling various pieces of paper to other pieces of paper, and you want a satisfying meal that won't take very long? Usually when that happens I order in some lamb shawarma, because who wants to cook when they're fucking tired? I had to collate things today, and I walked to the water cooler twice. But sometimes, I decide to throw some crap in a pot and ...
...as of late
- You are so not off the hook
- 2008, Over and Out
- Weekend Frig: Yes, I am 12 Years Old
- Waiting for Santa
- Waterloo du patisserie, deuxieme
- Waterloo du patisserie, le premiere part.
- Cheap Ass Monday: Cuddle up with a big bowl of Cheerios
- I didn’t have a single drink, ocifer.
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