September 2008 First Thursday: The Grill 08 Sep 08

September 2008 was all about gorgeous grilled foods and over-achievers. I don’t know if the multiple-recipe entrants are trying to make up for lost time or just want to make the rest of you look bad, but some people are definitely working overtime here.

Roundup after the jump, and October 2008 info at the end!

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You say tomato, I say to-WHOA, Nellie. 28 Aug 08

I would have invited you over for dinner, but I couldn’t find your phone number anywhere, I SWEAR.

I’m a little sad tonight, because I’ve just learned that I’ve wasted 30 years of my life not eating delicious, delicious tomatoes.

You see, I always thought I didn’t like tomatoes. Tomato sauce, sure (as long as there are no visible tomato chunks), tomato soup, okay, tomato ketchup, acceptable. But a whole, raw tomato? No, thank you, I’ll pass.

You can imagine how much this endeared me to my mother and nonna and zias.

As it turns out, I DO like tomatoes. A lot. What I DON’T like are the mealy, soulless, pale pink simulacra of tomatoes generally available in the standard American supermarket.

I didn’t know. Dear lord, I DIDN’T KNOW.

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Cheap Ass Monday: You’ve got me all a-frittered 26 Aug 08

On Moishe, on Herschel, on Schlomo!

Joy of joys: a Cheap Ass Monday that does not revolve around beans as a source of protein! Yea, there is nary a legume to be seen here.

Okay, that is not technically true, as there are peanuts involved and it is in fact the case that peanuts are legumes and not true nuts. But shut up, because you know what I meant. Do I come to your blog and nitpick you?*

Tonight, in a slightly fancy-pantsier version of Cheap Ass Mondays, protein and fiber-rich whole grains and veggies come together in curried summer vegetable fritters with sweet chili sauce and a peanut-quinoa pilaf. Or, for the more humble minded among us, veggie latkes with quinoa. L’chaim!

*I might, but I probably have a VERY GOOD REASON.

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Thursday Night Smackdown: Blintzkrieg! 22 Aug 08

How is this dinner, and not dessert? Not that I’m complaining, but come now, Jews. You’re pulling my leg, right?

Where did I leave off? Oh, right, with an aborted attempt at blintz casserole and my gradual descent into the gaping maw of madness. I’m back to my standard non-psychotic level of insanity, and that can only mean one thing: I can stop throwing dozens of hours of my life away watching Olympic beach volleyball in a drug-induced stupor.* Also, baked cheese.

*Although I did like how they played the cock rock in between serves, to make it seem like they were playing at a real Jersey beach circa 1991 and not a stadium in China. Can YOU take me down to paradise city? I thought not.**

**Also at a Jersey beach the matches would probably involve more brawling, which I believe the Olympic Committee frowns upon outside of events that are supposed to involve brawling, like judo and field hockey.

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August 2008 Roundup: Finish your veg, or no beer for you. 11 Aug 08

Have I mentioned to y’all lately that you’re awesome? Because you seriously are.

Modern pharmacology and I are gradually clawing our way toward stability, and most of you correctly surmised that I’d be skipping my own First Thursday for August. Which I did, because it was getting hard to adjust seasoning correctly what with all the tears in the pot fucking up the salt levels. But some of you didn’t skip it, because you are supportive and wonderful and possibly also slightly crazy yourselves, and I couldn’t deprive you of the joys of roundupedness.

Here are your seasonal, colorful veggie dishes:

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Cheap Ass Mondays: Italian Beach Pasta 28 Jul 08

I accidentally took all of these pictures with my camera set on “foliage.” Sorry.

Tonight’s dinner is a total throwback to my childhood, and has not been modified in any way from the way my mom used to make it. It’s an odd dish, I don’t really know its origins and I don’t really expect anyone to believe that it’s good, but it’s cheap, easy, tasty and makes fantastic leftovers.

May I present to you: spaghetti pie. Yes, spaghetti pie, that’s what I said. Spaghetti + Pie. Spaghetti pie.

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Vanquishing the Noid 27 Jul 08

Le sigh.

Hello. My name is Michelle, and I am addicted to grilled pizza.

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Pluot Pluot, Fizz Fizz 22 Jul 08

What a relief it is, mothafuckas.

So I mosey into Pathmark the other night looking for bargain basement, just-about-to-turn plums to make some sorbet, bag up a couple pounds of soft, deep crimson beauties and bring ‘em home only to discover that they’re not plums and I should pay more attention to labels. They’re pluots, a plum-apricot hybrid. Frig. I really wanted plums.

I bite into one to get a sense of the flavor, and I gotta tell you: pluots are a SHAM. I know a plum when I taste a damn plum, and these? Are freaking plums. But I can’t be too pissed at the pluots, because I’d wanted plums anyway. Serendipity!

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Cheap Ass Monday: Cheap As Free 21 Jul 08

I am BACK. A gaping wound IS NOT ENOUGH TO STOP ME.

I’ve never had a cut deep enough that it healed from the inside out before; even though it’s clearly knitting together underneath and is no longer seeping, it still looks like I have an open gash in my hand. Grody.

Dinnertime!

Aside from a side salad this meal should be practically free, because all the ingredients should already be present in your well-stocked pantry.* Plus, it makes so many leftovers that the cost per meal is probably, like, $0.17. (I haven’t done the math yet, but I’m sure that’s pretty accurate). For this next installment of bean-based cheapass meals I bring you smoky chickpea stew over polenta fries, starring the official spice of Winter 2008** and continued TNS favorite, smoked paprika.

*Okay, fine, you had to buy them at some point for them to be in your pantry. Don’t be such a stickler; this is why you never have any fun.

**I declared this several times in comments around the foodblogosphere, so I assume it’s become common knowledge at this point.

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Thursday Night Smackdown: I’d Hit That 17 Jul 08

I would, and I DID.

It’s still hotter than Hades, I still have a gaping wound in my palm, AND the new Batman movie opens tonight at midnight. All of those factors combine to force a quick and easy, light-on-heat-and-cooking smackdown. Ipso facto, salad.

When I want salad, I turn to Susan Spicer’s Crescent City Cooking. God help me, that woman knows how to compose a fucking salad. On the menu tonight: marinated lentil salad with fresh tomatoes and goat cheese.

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