Taciturn Tuesday: (insert funny headline)


Coworker of mine?
If you are, you are welcome.
This cake is for you.

a grand old chocolate cake, in stages.

I’d write a real post
but was up ’til all hours
baking this damn cake.

Why? Office party.
And the resident foodie
cannot disappoint.

a grand old chocolate cake, in stages.

So no description,
loving, of these beaten eggs.
You get some haiku.

Life, she is not fair.
So you should get a helmet.
Safety first, my friends.

a grand old chocolate cake, in stages.

This cake is not mine.
It is Epicurious,
but I can’t top it.

Dark chocolate, coffee,
it is redolent and rich.
Resistance = futile.

Yes, the equal sign
is cheating. But it is late;
the rules are hazy.

a grand old chocolate cake, in stages.

The liquid batter
bakes forever and ever.
Also: and then some.

Could have spent that time
writing a real post, but I
fear I indulge you.

Keep expectations low,
and you can fob a haiku
post, feeling no shame.

a grand old chocolate cake, in stages.

Perfectly flat tops
mean you don’t have to trim them.
A godsend for some.

I mean, we’re not all
facile with the trimming knife.
I’m only human.

For this same reason
I didn’t split the layers.
Also I’m lazy.


I spit on low light
that doesn’t let me get
needed shutter speed.

If I had good light,
you would see the whir! whir! whir!
and not just this blargh.

I fully support
you starting a collection
for my new Speedlite.


Like so many things,
frosting is better with booze.
Bailey’s Irish Cream.

I’m sorry you won’t
be there. Not my colleagues. They?
Will kill for cake. Again.


There are no pics of the
frosting process. Greasy hands
plus camera = full stop.

A bakery box
makes things more professional,
even for a schlub.

I’ll try to shoot the
innards, if vulture colleagues
can lay off long enough.

But no promises.


19 thoughts on “Taciturn Tuesday: (insert funny headline)

  1. I also have the damn luck for being known for a time-consuming, back-breaking, labor-intensive cookie! So yes, I know the feeling of having to show up at any occasion bearing the little rolled cinnamon bastards.
    Perfection can be a cross to bear.

  2. jesi, i believe that is one of the officially approved ways of eating nutella, and one in which i have often indulged.

    allison, thank you.

    kristin, not working is the tradeoff for not having cake.

    laura, we’ll see how it goes over tonight! there are always such high expectations for my food, it makes me nervous.

    cynic, thank you for feeling my pain.

  3. I love the photo of the swirling frosting. Shutter speed change not necessary.

    Being a resident foodie can mean much disappointment. I was the only one who signed up for the office cookie swap.

  4. I work in an office full of so-called foodies, but most of the cakes brought in to the office are straight out of the Cake Mix Doctor’s cookbook. I may have to make this cake for our next potluck and put them all to shame!
    Beautifully written post, btw.

  5. ah, this reminds me of the irish car bomb cake i made for a friend’s birthday. so craving chocolate cake and baileys frosting now. i’m jealous of the flat cakes, too! oh and since everyone else did it,

    thursday night smackdown
    makes chocolate perfection
    also makes me smile

  6. You wrote this whole post in haiku! Talk about making an effort!

    Also, your comment on the equal sign being a cheat reminds me of my friend’s little sister having a haiku assignment and being a syllable short. She just added “Yeah.” at the end.

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