Horrifying Shit That I Do Not Want Tuesday

It can’t be all sunshine and rainbows.

I give you this line to contemplate: “What child doesn’t imagine a house made of meat during the holidays?” Does it resonate with you? If so, please stay far away from me at all times.

Seriously. Far away.

But it does sound enticing, no?

“Not only will you get the complete Hot Dog Hideaway, but also a set of meat landscaping materials to make pimento loaf trees and meatball bushes.”

Pimento loaf trees!

Although I have to say, raise your hand if you would eat a pimento loaf tree if you were high. You know you would.

(A joke? Obviously, because their claim that it will “remain edible for 3 weeks at room temperature” is patently false; it would last 2 at best.  But that does not change the fact that you would eat this if you were high.)

0 thoughts on “Horrifying Shit That I Do Not Want Tuesday

  1. I laughed til I cried! First, I thought that was the scariest thing I ever saw. But then, can you think of a better gift to get a Dad or Grandpa into crafting?!?! Mom can sit down with her knitting or needlepoint and Dad can build a preservative filled house of meat that can sit out for THREE weeks at room temp. Ew gad.

  2. Well, considering that it comes from Archie McPhee, purveyor of all things warped to maladjusted adults and children everywhere, I’d say the catalog writer knows full well the double-entendre possibilities of “hot dog hideaway.” Who the hell would pay $80 for it, though, I have no idea.

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