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This artisanal post was handcrafted just for YOU using the finest in locally sourced vocabulary on 26 Jan 2009, and is filed under the frig?.

Allons, enfents de la Frigging Patrie.

BOILERPLATE: Have you heard? I’m a finalist in the 2009 Bloggies. Best-Kept Secret Blog! No shitting. In honor of this momentous occasion, I’ve added a new page to the site specifically to pander for votes.

It’s been a while since we’ve contemplated horrifying foodstuffs, has it not? I mean, except for this, but I think the jury’s still out on whether it’s actually a bad idea or not.   The jury, however, is unanimous in its rejection of the following; the image below gives me the serious heebie jeebies.

The only hint I will give you: it is NOT a toast-loving slug:


Anarchivist, this is a new low.

And so we end this post as we end all The Frig? posts, with the question posed by the famous Bernard Pivot:  The Frig?

Also, a hearty thank you to everyone who helped me win Best Food Blog – Humor in this year’s Food Blog Awards.   I fully concede that I only won because David Lebovitz did not pick up the red phone to activate his legions of fans.  Thank you for butting out, Lebovitz.

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19 Comments

  1. BHL
    January 26, 2009

    roasted red pepper aiolli squirted over melted cheese on toast?

  2. dawnalee
    January 26, 2009

    some sort of melted cheese on toast, and the squirt immediately brought to mind fry sauce.

  3. Kate
    January 26, 2009

    Congrats on being the winningest humor food blog out there, Michelle.

    Also, I vote for sundried tomato puree over melted cheese on wheat toast. OR ketchup-Sriracha mix squirted over a piece of clear melted plastic on toast. Just sayin’.

  4. GP
    January 26, 2009

    despite the photog :) I’ve still voted for you..
    gp

  5. cindy
    January 26, 2009

    it looks like really old Reuben with out the beef. um, yum…could that look less appetizing?

  6. Eddie
    January 26, 2009

    Is it baconaise?

  7. michelle
    January 26, 2009

    BHL, that sounds far better than the reality.

    dawnalee, if that’s what “fry sauce” looks like, i’m not sure i want to ask you to tell me what it is.

    kate, thanks! also, you are getting warmer and both of those things sound absolutely disgusting. well played!

    GP, i’m glad i didn’t drive you away. tonight there will be a post about actual edible food, i promise.

    cindy: no.

    eddie, would that it were; would that it were.

  8. Kerry
    January 26, 2009

    The orange-ish squirt looks like a cheezie that’s gone nuclear. (And, for some reason, I think the ‘eater’ of this might need a trip to the bathroom afterwards…)

  9. aen
    January 26, 2009

    individually wrapped american cheese on bread, microwaved without taking the plastic of

  10. Vanessa
    January 26, 2009

    rye bread with russian dressing and melted swiss cheese? a reuben gone horribly wrong, i think.

  11. Rachel (S[d]OC)
    January 26, 2009

    Yay you! When I was finally able to do so, I voted my little heart out for you.

    I think that thing is one of those fish noodles you made a while back, but decided to try to add a little ketchup to see if it would improve the taste.

  12. toontz
    January 26, 2009

    Congratulations to you!

    And that picture is really, really revolting.

  13. Whitney
    January 26, 2009

    Raw honey with peanut butter on wheat toast?

  14. SK
    January 26, 2009

    Melba toast/melted cheese/thousand island?

  15. anna l'americana
    January 26, 2009

    What SK said, but nuked?

    You are now the queen of the Frig also. Would that there was an award for that….

  16. ErikaK
    January 27, 2009

    The squirt of stuff looks like something that came out of one of those creepy fish paste tubes from Ikea

  17. Deirdre
    January 27, 2009

    I’m going with bread, fish skin, and thousand island dressing. I’m also praying it’s the wrong answer.

  18. Brian
    January 27, 2009

    It looks like some nasty bird poop on a melted cafeteria spoon all on top of some old diner wheat toast. Even though you told me what it is, it still looks like that to me. And no, I don’t know what kind of bird would poop that. I wouldn’t want to know.

  19. michelle
    January 28, 2009

    y’all, every single one of your answers is more revolting than what’s actually pictured (not that that detracts from the grossness in any way).

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