No one, because no one actually came here via the phrase “fuck the chicken,” which is disappointing in a bizarre kind of way. But below the jump are the top 10 most icky from the past day or two. This is what you get for having a pottymouth, kids. Clean up your acts.
Which one is your favorite?
- “goat fuck pork” (My favorite, tied with #8)
- “fuck you google go suck china dick”
- “suck your dick”
- “tyler florence is a douchebag” (6 times!)
- “12 years old cock pic” (NOT my favorite)
- “i can suck my dick”
- “fuck”
- “jar goes in ass” (Tied with #1, because it makes me wonder, is there something IN the jar? Or is it just an empty glass jar? Because that seems like more of a safety hazard than the other types of things one might insert into one’s ass, as there would be nothing inside the jar exerting counterpressure against the ass. I have a lot of time to think.)
- “cucumber in ass”
- “little fresh ass”
And this one, which is not at all dirty but I LOVE it:
“how to make a pulley to eat spaghetti”
ETA: Best of the day: “What condiment would Jesus use?” I’m going to Cafe Press to make WCWJU merchandise immediately? Anyone wanna make a graphic?
Just as a horrific note – #8 was probably someone looking for a very disgusting vid of a guy shoving a jar in his tochis…then the jar breaks. In his tochis. It’s horrific. Seriously.
Did I mention horrific? Because it totally was.
Oh good, I’m not the only one who gets a kick out of search engine results hits. We get a lot of weird ones, but I guess naming the blog jerkdoublebitch didn’t really help that. Either way, highly entertaining. I gotta vote for 4, especially if they really looked for it that many times.
steph, double happy bonus points for your use of the word tochis.
My favorite for my own blog was #1 result for “brussel sprout recipe fuck.”
heather, AWESOME.
OMG…I don’t know which one is more hilarious – except for #5, which is seriously disturbing and not in the funny way. I want to know how to construct a pulley to eat my spaghetti.
I.. can’t stop giggling. I am a sick sick man.
#4 Cannot be stated often or as fervently enough.
Fuck him and his little polo shirt.
Having said that, I think the one about the China dick is my favorite.
#1 is awesome…it’s the original name for a recipe I actually put on the menu for an event my catering class was doing, before Chef Mike pointed out that the Dean would be attending and probably wouldn’t like it…changed it to Calypso Pork after that. I also like #4 and am going to go search it now!
I’m gonna have to go with #2. That’s an angry Google user right there.
I never get disturbing search hits like this. I guess my site is too tame. Though I do get a lot of hits for people wanting to know about butchering a deer. Which I suppose some people find disturbing. Such is my life.
tanya, i will give $5 to whoever invents that pulley.
brian, no worries, i’ve always though “goat fuck pork” was inherent in the idea of calypso pork.
kristin, you have to cuss out the ass to get thus stuff. see, right there: “out the ass.” that’s gonna get me some more.
also, this morning i got “how to cook pony.” ew.
That is too funny.
I’ve started taking notes at weird ways people get to my blog. Usually they just mangle the name, but my favorite recent one is cleaner than yours but just as puzzling: “desert plant smells like cheeseburger.”